What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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