Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
