It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
