I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
