Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
ttyl tear gas
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
