Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
