Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize