when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
