remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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