then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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