he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
