its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
