found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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