real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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