what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
