just come out here and I will go home with you...
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize