thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Randomize
