Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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