If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
