seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
