we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
