idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
