Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
