what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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