this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
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