My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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