"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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