Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
My ass is underappreciated
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
