so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
