My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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