Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize