I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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