That's when you crack a 10am beer
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
