He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
