Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
