I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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