ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize