Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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