sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I am naked and annoyed.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize
