Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
