I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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