Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
