Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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