im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
