wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Your cock deserves a montage
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
