Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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