Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
