Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I smell like Dick and happiness
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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