____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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