literally had 100 drinks last night.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
