Its about making memories worth repressing
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
