So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize