She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
