And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
